So once again I realize that I'm way behind on blogging. I have lots of ideas for creative funny blogs in my head that haven't made it up yet. Some are even in the draft stage. But sorry people (both of you) just not in the mood today. I could talk about the great Christmas I had or the adventures of taking both kitties to visits to the vet, but not gonna happen today. I just don't have it in me.
January will be my ninth month of working 2 jobs. And quite frankly I'm exhausted. My plan was to quit my part time one at the end of the month. Before that it was the beginning of December. Now I don't know what to do.
You see I got written up at Planned Parenthood for basically making a bunch of stupid mistakes. All of which happened at the Valley health center. Also all of which were when I was working the front desk. Which I only do twice a week, and trying to learn everything while only doing it twice a week has been a real bitch. After the written up incident I told my supervisor that I felt it was a training issue and I need to do it consistently or I will never know what I'm doing. She agreed so I have been working out there all this week.
Well then the shit hit the fan as one of the receptionist at another clinic resigned. Now I will have to fill her spot twice a week and work alone. So it has gone to snail pace training to hurry up and learn everything training. Which also means all of my recall/follow up work that I do the other 3 days a week is falling behind. So it's been stressful. I also know that I made some mistakes this week. I realize that everyone makes mistakes but I was told I needed to improve immediately or my job was in jeopardy. I found this to be harsh since the training sucked and I do well the other 3 days of the week. (I basically have 2 different jobs in case anyone was confused) If you need more clarification email me and I will explain in more detail.
Anyway, I was very upset by this as I'm used to being the best at work and I'm much more harder on myself than anyone ever could be. My fear is that if I quit my part time job I will then get fired and have zero jobs. Not a good thing as I've been working my ass off to try and save money to buy a new car and we want to move into a bigger place in spring. I suppose if I get that new car we could always live in that.
Maybe I'm just paranoid but I also feel like I'm back in middle school and I'm the new kid nobody likes. I mean I feel like people talk shit about me. I have no proof of this but it's just a feeling I get. Maybe I'm paranoid. There's also one person in particular who is really not patient or nice and I kind of want to punch in the face all the time. So that's not helping either.
I started looking for new jobs but that just made me feel worse. Mainly because well there aren't any and I feel I've done nothing but look for a job the last 3 years of my life. If not more. All week long I've been going over what to do and analyzing every possible decision. I still have no answers. I really want to do well but maybe it's just not meant to be. I really don't feel like proof reading so excuse any errors. I'll try to write something more upbeat next time but I make no promises.
